ChristianMilitaryWives

A Season Of Stepping Down To Step Up
 August 17, 2010

Why is it better to obey than to sacrifice?

Incredible as it may seem, I am still amazed how God opens doors and cultivates friendships in the most unique ways. For instance, a year ago I attended a weekend women’s conference at Southeast Christian Church in Louisville, KY. A dear friend, that I met over twenty years ago while teaching fitness classes at our local YMCA, accompanied me. My initial meeting with this friend provoked thoughts of, “she may be a little too happy.” As time passed and I got to know her better, I began to recognize she didn’t change; she was always happy regardless of the circumstances or situations in her personal life. After all these years, she is still wild and crazy in love with Jesus Christ; filled with the Holy Spirit 24/7. She is like a geyser at Yellowstone, splashing the joy of the Lord on everyone within shouting distance. When you are in her presence, prepare to be loved and feel special. She is bubbling with joy continually, so much joy, those that do not know her question her sanity. While standing in the lobby of this magnificent church, I overheard the whispers of attendees who questioned if my friend could possibly be drunk. Laughing silently I watched my friend interact with those who judged her without knowing her. She joked with them and slugged them gently in the shoulder and then gave each of them a big hug. Watching the facial expressions of some of those ladies, I pulled her aside and told her that I needed a strong cup of coffee. The smell of fresh brewed cocoa beans was calling my name. My friend was not interested in coffee as she scurried away into the church book store. The line for coffee was quite long and several minutes passed without much progress except for an increased appetite for the fresh brewed cup of joy. My friend returned and instantly started pulling on my arm, insisting that we go back to the book store before the conference started again. It was at that point that I understood the condition of vapors; it’s the repeated smell of fresh coffee without ever getting to drink the coffee. Arm in arm, along with my vapors, we entered the bookstore and my friend quickly, and rather loudly announced, that my book needed to be made available in this bookstore. The quiet lady standing behind the counter looked puzzled (no surprise) as my friend explained joyfully that I had written a book and that it needed to be in their store for others to read. As I nervously fanned myself, the store worker calmly told her that their manager was not in the store and that maybe we should check back later. Just as God had planned it, the manager walked in and wanted to know what all the commotion was about. My friend gladly explained who I was and told her she needed my book in their book store. I stood there embarrassed not knowing what to say after my friends’ grandiose introduction of me. The manager politely asked for my business card and said she would get in contact with me at a later date. Making a bee line out of the store with my friend giggling and praising God, I headed back towards the coffee shop, this time fully in need of a strong cup of coffee. My friend kept saying to me, “I told you God wants your book in that store.” Honestly, I didn’t think I would hear back from the church book store manager. Two weeks later I received an email from the manager asking me to send my products for review. A month later my book and DVD’s were being sold in their church book store. Telling my friend the good news, she wasn’t surprised at all. She praised God over the phone and sang a song for me. From this door of opportunity my book was selected as their book of the month and I was asked to be a guest speaker at their church. My friendship with the book store manager continued to develop by email and we were able to see each other in person on my recent trip to St Louis. She was on fire for Jesus and explained that she would soon be moving to Charleston South Carolina to minister to those who do not know Jesus Christ as their Savior. She was giving up her position at the church and she and her husband were selling their home at the end of summer. I asked what prompted her and her husband to give up their great jobs in Louisville and pack up and move to a place she wasn’t familiar with. She explained that she had read a book, “Crazy Love,” by Francis Chan and that it totally changed her life. After reading the book she started asking herself, “Is this the most loving way to do life? Am I loving my neighbor and my God by living where I live, by driving what I drive, by talking how I talk, by working where I work?” She said a lot more and I knew that she was in Gods’ will, without a doubt. She and her family were willing to leave their comfortable jobs and nice homes to minister to those they didn’t even know. WOW! I decided to purchase the book, Crazy Love for myself and find out what this author writes that transformed my friends’ life. One of the questions the author asks is, “Do you live as though faith, demonstrated through love, really is the only thing that counts?” Personally speaking, I can honestly say I do a poor job of loving others the way God calls us to love. According to the Word of God loving others allows us to be free. I don’t feel so free at times in my Christian life, do you? In the book of Galatians 5:13-14 Paul writes, “You, my brothers, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the sinful nature; rather, serve one another in love. The entire law is summed up in a single command: “Love your neighbor as yourself.” Crazy Love is also making a difference in my life; I don’t want to be a luke warm Christian claiming Christ’s name and not walking my talk. I know I must be willing to change more each day and draw closer to Christ if I want to live a life pleasing to God. I ask God daily to help me love Him first and then love others unconditionally. This is an ongoing process that I have not mastered but I will continue praying and loving.

 

As I welcomed my husband home from his annual three day church golf outing, I noticed a careful hesitancy in his movements. He said, “Seventy-two holes in less than seventy- two hours was very tiring. It was hot, muggy and cart path only, which made it feel like I walked everyone of those seventy-two holes. I’m a little sore and uncomfortable. This weekend was a real test.” My husband loves golf but he puts just about everything before playing golf. Even though he puts everything before golf, he still expects to play at a high level and have the endurance necessary to play indefinitely. As he complained about the stiffness in his lower back I held my tongue until he was done. Finally I said, “You are uncomfortable because your core has become too comfortable. Golf requires practice and flexibility and playing once a year, without regular exercise and stretching, has stressed your body. Your core has failed the test.”

Nearly everyone has experienced an enlightening moment in their personal life when you say to yourself, “I really understand that, or, I get it!” It could be something you have been studying for years and suddenly the light bulb comes on. Children experience this moment when they grow into mature adults. Remember, I said mature, not just adults. All of a sudden Mom and Dad become much wiser. As mature adults, it is funny how we say and do things like our own parents did, that we swore we would never do or say. Now my husband is very wise about a lot of things but when I told him about his core being too comfortable, he looked as though the light bulb was burning at two hundred watts. Taking the test helped him understand where he stood and that’s a good thing.

The plank test is a good way to measure the fitness of your core. Lie face down on your mat with elbows resting on the floor next to chest. Push your body off the floor in a pushup position with body resting on elbows or hands. Contract the abdominals and keep the body in a straight line from head to toes. Hold for 30-60 seconds and repeat as many times as possible. The plank is an isolation move used in Pilates and Yoga to work the abs, back, arms and legs. The plank also targets your internal abdominal muscles. For beginners, do this move on your knees and gradually work your way up to balancing on your toes. Try the test and see where you stand.
 

As I was teaching my fitness class last week I experienced one of those “Aha, enlightening” moments. The devotional for the day was from the book of Psalms 139:1-5. “O Lord you have searched me and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise, you perceive my thoughts from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways. Before a word is on my tongue you know it completely, O Lord. You hem me in- behind and before; you have laid your hand upon me.” The book of Psalms is placed right in the center of the Bible and is packed full of beautiful prayers and songs that express the psalmist’ love and deepest feelings for God. Interestingly, the prayers in Psalms are either rejoicing or in despair. The beauty of this book is that we can pick out any Psalm and apply it to our life today. It never grows stale or out of date.

Psalms helps me feel better about my own mistakes and mishaps knowing that God’s chosen people had good days and some really bad days. While we exercised, I explained to the class that God knew we were going to gather together at that very moment in time to praise and worship Him. He knew I was going to teach Power Pump and that we would pray before the class started. Can you imagine knowing every single detail of each of your children? He evens knows our very intimate thoughts before we think them? How amazing is that? I want my thoughts to reflect Christ but sometimes my thoughts are kind of stinky. This requires me to be totally bound to God and to depend on Him for right thinking. I struggle with this on an everyday basis. But don’t you find a comfort knowing God knows every single detail of your life? Or do you? Have you tested your thoughts and actions? How can we mature as Christians if we are unwilling to test our thoughts and actions?

For my husband, he has discovered to reach his potential he must practice and play more often. For those who want a stronger body they must decide to take action. For those who want to walk more closely with God, they must be willing to be uncomfortable, so they can become comfortable, practicing and passing the test.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 Wednesday is trash pickup day at our home. By Thursday morning my husband is making strategic plans about our garbage for the next week. He divides the garbage into big bags and little bags with the big bags taken to the transfer station on Saturday. The trash toter is used for small bags and things too smelly to stay in the back of the pickup until Saturday. (The smelly stuff is diapers and the six month old home made vegetable soup in the basement refrigerator that was hidden in the back. We all thought the smell was the boys’ shoes.) I suggested that maybe we should get a second toter to take care of the big bags. That seemed very logical but my husband said that for our trash production and the size of the containers, we would need five. We are deluged in refuse.

We do have a lot of trash. You know it’s a lot when your teenage son notices the trash cans are always full. The teenagers normally do not have this problem in the basement domain because they just throw their bottles and wrappers on the ground. Evidently we were too discreet in hiding the trash cans in the cabinet. From what I’m told by other parents of teenagers, this is pretty normal. They always pickup their trash, it’s just on a different timetable than I would prefer.

 Here’s the bottom line. Even though my husband makes strategic plans on our trash and my son’s recognize the trash cans are full; no one likes making the long trip down our lane to the toter.

What if everyone had to carry their own toter filled with their own trash? I know it sounds far fetched but is it? Think about all the things that penetrate the mind. Normally, a certain amount of that information sticks. That’s wonderful if it is wholesome and pure but what if it’s junk? There’s a lot of junk on the information super highway and that road runs straight into our head which then impacts the heart and soul. Even if you are a person who tries to keep the toter clean, there’s always someone trying to empty their toter into yours. Stinkin’ thinkin’, that’s just someone trying to dump their dirty diapers into your toter.
 

The Lord laid it on my heart to incorporate some trash talking in my Pilates class the other night. Right in the middle of the Pilates Hundred, I reminded the class to be mindful of what we think while exercising. Romans 12:2 prompted me to address the subject of the mind, “Be transformed by the renewing of your mind…” Without hesitation I told the class to take the trash out. This generated some strange expressions but I definitely had their attention. As we transitioned into the single leg stretch I continued with the trash talking. “Here’s the way it is, sometimes I have to take the trash out 5 to 7 times a day.” When I am distracted the trash starts to fill my toter and before you know it, the toter’s overflowing. That’s no way to glorify God but I also know it’s wonderful not needing to wait until Wednesday to dump the toter. God is always available for purification through prayer.

We talk real trash when we constantly diminish His creation or compare ourselves to others. He is pleased with what He has created and it is a lack of faith to see ourselves incapable of being used by God to do His work. That kind of thinking needs an emergency trash pickup. God has so much faith in us that He made sharing His love with others our number one responsibility. He knows that with His help, all things our possible.

The book of Proverbs says the words of gossip are like choice morsels; they go down to a man’s inmost parts. Just a few verses over in Proverbs it says the tongue has the power of life and death. Could it be possible that we can make ourselves physically ill or feel bad by the way we speak or think? The mind is powerful and what we think is usually what we believe to be true in our heart. Proverbs 23:7 reads, “For as he thinks in his heart, so is he.” Wow, that’s sort of sums it up.

Transitioning into the Plank series I cued the students on posture and reminded them to keep their power house strong and tight and to stay aligned from head to toe. Knowing that we would be doing at least seven minutes of planks, I suggested to the participants to take their minds off the demands of the exercise and place their thoughts on prayer for someone else. As I continued cueing the students I suggested that with each plank they should pray specifically for a different person. From the groans it appeared they were praying in earnest.

Our cool down time was spent arching our spine towards heaven in the cat position, breathing deeply and purposefully. Our spiritual development requires purposeful prayer time and breathing in the breath of God. Continue to strengthen your power house muscles as you ask God to renew you from mind to toe. Be mindful, trash removal requires an everyday strategy but I know a Good Book that can help you with His plan.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Body & Soul

Adding God’s Favor to your Bottom Line

July 3, 2010

 

Last week while purchasing a birthday card at a local Christian book store, my eyes were drawn to the five dollar items the store had to offer near the check out line. Normally I pick up a book or devotional in their sale items but this time I felt lead to buy a movie. The young clerk praised my selection and immediately announced the movie was one of the finest films he had seen. Being a skeptic shopper I began to think, “He really needs to make a sale.”  But he continued, “Flywheel was the first faith based film produced by a church in Georgia. The movie making ministry in this church went on to produce Facing the Giants and then Fireproof.” He went on to say that the quality of the film was less than perfect, but the message was inspiring and motivational.

I was sold; five dollars didn’t seem like too much to spend on a movie, even if we didn’t watch it right away. I thanked the young man and left the store. Most Saturday evenings are spent with my family eating dinner and watching a movie on television. This particular evening my husband could not find anything on television that wasn’t a rerun or inappropriate. As he turned off the television I remembered the movie that I purchased earlier in the day. As I made my sales pitch to my husband and daughter about the movie, I couldn’t help but notice the same skepticism I had demonstrated to the young clerk. “Look, it may not be the highest quality but it comes highly recommended, and at least it will be decent to watch.”

The clerk was absolutely right, it was not Avatar or Transformers but neither one of those films touched me like Flywheel. As I reached for a tissue to dry my crying eyes, I noticed my daughter was doing the same. We both laughed at each other and continued to watch. Without giving away the whole story, the main character is a used car salesman who does his best, or worst, to live up to the stereotype. The salesman buys a beautiful classic convertible that he wants to restore. The only problem is the car’s engine will not run. Through the restoration process the car is not the only thing that is restored. The salesman turned his life and everything in it over to Jesus Christ. Although I have already committed my life to Christ years ago, this movie had my attention. I began to question myself; have I really turned everything over to God? If so, why do I become so concerned and worried about things?

It is very easy to say we commit everything to the Lord but then when things happen that are out of our control it’s more difficult to live out those words. When, not if, life gets turned upside down and we feel things are spiraling out of control this is the time when we really need to put our faith into action. Faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see. They say that the bottom of the barrel offers the clearest view of heaven. The choice is whether you will stare at the bottom or look to the Lord.

Very early the next morning, I stepped out on my front deck and turned my business, Shaped by Faith, over to God. After all, this faith based fitness ministry is His; I am only His vessel in this business. As I handed God the keys to my business in prayer, my soul felt rejuvenated and empowered. I asked Him to do with Shaped by Faith as He willed to do. I asked Him for His favor and that His will be done. In Proverbs 8:35 He says, “For whoever finds me finds life and receives favor from the Lord.”

As I am preparing for the International Christian Retail Show in St Louis, my prayer is that God will be glorified while teaching Pilates to the attendees and that all that attend will be blessed. I am mindful that God gave me this opportunity to reach others in a unique way and I consider it a blessing to be able to serve Him. His living water makes serving Him satisfying and desirable. His strength lessens our burdens and empowers us to walk out each day with confidence and boldness in our faith.

Watching this film reminds us that everything that is good comes from above. We are the vessels God uses to draw others close to Him. It is so easy to think “big me” but it should be “we serve a Big God.” My prayer is for all of us to give God our families, jobs, relationships, business opportunities, gifts, talents and health. That means everything, including ourselves. When we do this, watch out, great things are on the horizon for all who place their complete trust in Him.

 

 

 

Lately, we have seen an influx of emails requesting prayer for military marriages to be restored. The war has played a big toll on straining marriages. Months and years at a distance from one you care for is demanding, let alone all of the other stresses that come with war. The loss of friends, questioning of life and watching as those you love who are hurting due to the side effects of combat.

I was just sitting here listening to the song, Cry Out To Jesus by Third Day.

For the marriage that's struggling just to hang on
They lost all of their faith and love
They've done all they can to make it right again
Still it's not enough

When your lonely (when you're lonely)
And it feels like the whole world is falling on you
You just reach out, you just cry out to Jesus
Cry to Jesus

The lyrics of this song are ring so true. When you are lonely and it feels like the world is falling on you… you just reach out, you just cry out to Jesus. How many times do you talk to friends and inform them about your marriage dilemma? It’s imperative to remember that God is your friend, He is there for you. He loves you, God delights in His children… you are Gods child. God wants to see you happy, He wants to see your marriage bloom. God should be your best friend, the one you always turn to.  Let Jesus be your best friend, He loves you unconditionally.

Instead of crying out to your friends about your marital problems… cry out to Jesus!  If you put God first in your marriage... the other things will eventually fall into place!

Sunday in our house is really a very enjoyable day. We start out the morning by attending church and in grand family tradition come home to take a NAP. You may laugh at this but I remember every Sunday at my grandparents being exactly the same. My grandad, who was the Pastor of our church, would hit his recliner shortly after eating lunch and in short time be snoozing away. He would stay in the chair for the entire afternoon until it was time to get up and go back to church on Sunday night. So, today after lunch Katie and I headed to my bedroom to take a nice afternoon siesta. Katie is the youngest in our family, and even though she is five, she still enjoys being sung to sleep. I was humming to myself as I straightened the covers on my bed and she said "Mommy, sing me a lullaby." So I laid down next to her and as she snuggled up against me I started to sing . I always resort to Disney tunes when I can't think of anything right away. I began to hum one of my favorites from Snow White. It's the one where Snow White is still living in the castle, dressed like a poor servant girl , doing chores, all the while dreaming of the day when Prince Charming will come to her to take her away. As I hummed this song to Kate this thought hit me: I am Snow White. I am the Princess, living in a world that I wasn't destined to be in. I wasn't meant to be the servant girl dressed in rags. I was meant to be a bride, of a Prince nonetheless! And who might that Prince be you ask? Well He is the Prince of Peace, the Lord of Lords and the King of Kings, and better yet he's coming for me someday to. All of this dawned on me as I sang to Katie. Most women think of that someday when they will marry their Prince Charming as being the happiest moment of their life. I didn't marry a Prince, but I did marry my best friend. James is by far one of the best things that ever happened to me, and although I love him more than even I understand sometimes, he will never be my Prince. My Prince came to this earth and did the most noble thing anyone could ever do. He gave his life for me. He battled the very nature of evil and won, and best of all he went to prepare a place for me where I will live with him forever. Just like it says in the song " and away to his castle will go, to be happy forever I know, and the birds will sing, and wedding bells will ring, someday when my dreams come true" I'm so glad that Jesus has made my dream a reality and one day it will come true.

“Let him who walks in the dark, who has no light, trust in the name of the Lord and rely on his God” (Isaiah 50:10b).

Ever since I bought Sara Groves’ latest album Fireflies and Songs, the song titled “From this one place” has really stuck in my mind. I bet most of you can relate to the theme of the song, too. She talks about not being able to see the road in front of her, not knowing what the future holds, and how scary that is. Here’s the chorus:

“From this one place I can’t see very far/ In this one moment I’m square in the dark/These are the things I will trust in my heart/ You can see something else”

Does this sound like something you have said or felt before? One struggling military wife once told me she felt like she was so in the dark she couldn’t see her hand in front of her face, and it was all she could do to just keep putting one foot in front of the other. If we haven’t been in that place yet, I’m pretty confident that it’s only a matter of time before we are there too.

But the comfort comes in knowing that while we can’t see much from our point of view right now, God sees it all. He sees the big picture, and as Sara says in her song, He “can see something else.” Oh how we long to know what it is that God sees that we can’t! But if we could see it all at once, we wouldn’t have to trust Him. And I believe God wants to use the dark times of our lives to build our relationship with Him. In our darkest hours, it’s what we believe about God’s character that will sustain us. Do we believe that He is sovereign and in control? Do we believe that He is trustworthy? Our answers to these questions are more important than knowing the answers about what tomorrow will hold.

I absolutely love what Carolyn Custis James says in her book When Life and Beliefs Collide:

“God’s character is crucial, for there are moments in life when God’s goodness and love seem to come under a blackout. No matter how we strain our eyes, we cannot see any good, not a trace of God’s love . . . When faith cannot find something tangible to grasp, we are compelled to fly back to the ark of God’s unchanging, unfailing character. But faith will not find much of a foothold here if God is a stranger to us. Faith, in the finaly analysis, is trusting someone you know, even when you don’t always understand what he is doing” (page 73).

In a devotion titled “Faith Challenged” in the book Faith Deployed, Army wife Rebekah Benimoff shares this:

“When a young lady who once served on the chapel praise team with me learned that her husband had been killed in Iraq, those of us who served with her were shaken. while some people I knew were certain that God had told them everything would be okay, I had no such assurance. What God told me was quite different. He said that no matter what happens, He would carry me through. And to this day, He has” (page 216).

Rebekah was in the dark about her husband’s future, and about her future with him–as all of us are. But she learned to put her hope in the One who knows it all. “He can see something else…”

Jocelyn Green is the author of Faith Deployed: Daily Encoruagement for Military Wives, along with 14 other contributing writers, and maintains a Web site for military wives at www.faithdeployed.com.