ChristianMilitaryWives

January 15, 2010 - Claire Shackleford is at it again! We have been blessed to have such a wonderful array of inspiring Christian guests on our talk shows.  The Lord is GOOD! We are happy to announce that Daryl Knudeson and Jody Mayhew will be on the show LIVE 1/15/10 at 9pm EST.  Join our show live, participate in chat... you can join us by going to our main website, ChristianMilitaryWives.Com and just click LISTEN.  It's that simple!

Daryl Knudeson, Women’s Representative

Daryl has been a pastor’s wife for nearly nineteen years, with the past six as an Air Force chaplain’s wife. Daryl ministers with her husband Jason through counseling and teaching adults in the civilian and military communities. She is passionate about leading women in Bible Study, and has written several Bible studies which have been taught mainly within the military community of Protestant Women of the Chapel (USAF), and in her home study group. She has been involved with IRM since 1993, first attending summits, then facilitating women’s and co-ed summits for the past eight years. Jason and Daryl have three children.

 Jody Mayhew, Special Representative

Jody ministers with her husband, Dan, in Summit Fellowships, a network of house churches in Portland, Oregon. During the last twenty years, she has worked as a counselor and teacher to women, as well as a director and consultant for women's ministries. God has equipped her with discernment and a passion for Himself that has been used in a variety of summit contexts. As more communities have expressed a desire for coed summits, Mayhew has played a key role in that arena, often facilitating with her husband. They have three children.

This past Friday we had our first of the year radio show! We interviewed one of our own members, Jocelyn Green along with two other co-authors of the new book in the series, Stories of Faith and Courage from the war in Iraq and Afghanistan. 

You can listen to the interview HERE, and find excerpts from the book HERE. 

The book can be found easily at Amazon.

Here is some information on the book and on each of the authors taken from Jocelyn's Faith Deployed site.

Stories of Faith and Courage from the War in Iraq/Afghanistan, part of the Battlefields & Blessings series, is a 365-day collection of inspiring stories of courage perseverance and faith-based on firsthand accounts of more than seventy who have served in the war in Iraq and Afghanistan.Through multiple, never-before-told stories, readers will uncover the personal challenges of the battlefield. You’ll hear about the experiences and perspectives of deployed soldiers; chaplains; military wives, widows, parents and siblings; organizers of humanitarian efforts; veterans suffering from post-traumatic stress disorder; missionaries to the Middle East and more.

The book was co-authored by Jocelyn Green, Jane Hampton Cook and John Croushorn, and was released by AMG Publishers in November 2009.

About the Authors:

Jocelyn Green

Jocelyn Green is an award-winning freelance writer who pens articles for dozens of magazines, including Christianity Today, Today’s Christian, Today’s Pentecostal Evangel, Baptist Bulletin, EFCA Today, InSite and more. She also writes for nonprofits, universities and corporations such as Juicy Juice, Nestle, Publix and General Mills. Wife of a former Coast Guard officer, she authored Faith Deployed: Daily Encouragement for Military Wives(Moody Publishers 2008). She also edited and contributed toStories of Faith and Courage from World War 2 by Larkin Spivey, a 2009 Military Writers Society of America Silver Medal Winner. She’s a member of the Evangelical Press Association, the Christian Authors Network and the Advanced Writers and Speakers Association. She and her husband have two children, a dog and a cat, and reside in Cedar Falls, Iowa.

Jane Hampton Cook

Cook is the author of Stories of Faith and Courage from the Revolutionary War (2007), the second in the Battlefields & Blessings series,  and The Faith of America’s First Ladies(2006). Not long after the explosion of the World Wide Web, Cook became a pioneer in political Internet development as webmaster to President George W. Bush. She served five years, including two years as White House deputy director of Internet news services (2001-03) and three years in the Texas governor’s office (1998-01). In the White House, she redesigned whitehouse.gov and created the first stand-alone White House website for children, whitehousekids.gov. Cook directed Bush’s first expansive gubernatorial website in 1998 and designed his first presidential campaign website in 1999. She also received a history fellowship from the White House Historical Association in 2003 to conduct research on the White House and its heroic occupants. She and her husband, Dr. John Kim Cook, a U.S. Dept. of Homeland Security official, live with their two young sons in Vienna, Virginia.

John Croushorn, M.D.

Dr. John Croushorn is a residency-trained, board certified emergency medicine physician and Chairman of the Department of Emergency Medicine at Trinity Medical Center in Birmingham, Alabama. Dr. Croushorn’s experience with emergent care extends beyond the hospital in several ways. He served as command surgeon of Task Force 185, Army Combat Aviation, in Iraq in 2004. Dr. Croushorn was active in combat operations throughout the region in the second year of Operation Iraqi Freedom as well as functioning as crew and door gunner on Blackhawk and Chinook helicopters for just over 100 combat hours. 

Dr. Croushorn currently works with several federal agency special operations teams supporting the Global War on Terrorism as well as special operations assets in the Department of Defense (DoD). He consults for the FBI, the Department of Homeland Security, the Center of Operational Medicine and National Tactical Officers Association. He has designed products for use in tactical medicine as well as enhanced capability body armor and is involved with research at the Clinical Investigations Lab at Ft. Gordon, Georgia. He lives in Birmingham, Alabama, and is husband to Julie and father to Caleb and Katie. 

 

On Black Friday, Claire Shackelford and I teamed up to tackle the topic of Keeping The Spirit of Christmas.  So often times, stores spend hundreds of thousands of dollars to create promotional ads about upcoming sales that will take place on Black Friday.  The commercials are always geared to targeting individuals that celebrate Christmas in one way or another.

On the podcast, Claire brings up the fact that we have seen deaths in the United States associated with Black Friday.  Store workers who have been trampled to death because of eager shoppers trying to find a great deal.

We talk about how we can all remember how to keep the focus on Christ.  If you have not heard the podcast, you can download it and listen free by clicking HERE.  I hope you are blessed by listening.

Here's a wonderful poem that Claire read when she opened up the show...

'Twas the night before Jesus came and all through the house
Not a creature was praying, not one in the house.
Their Bibles were lain on the shelf without care
In hopes that Jesus would not come there.

The children were dressing to crawl into bed.
Not once ever kneeling or bowing a head.
And Mom in her rocker with baby on her lap
Was watching the Late Show while I took a nap.

When out of the East there arose such a clatter.
I sprang to my feet to see what was the matter.
Away to the window I flew like a flash,
Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash!

When what to my wondering eyes should appear
But angels proclaiming that Jesus was here.
With a light like the sun sending forth a bright ray
I knew in a moment this must be THE DAY!

The light of His face made me cover my head
It was Jesus! returning just like He had said.
And though I possessed worldly wisdom and wealth,
I cried when I saw Him in spite of myself.

In the Book of Life which He held in His hand
Was written the name of every saved man.
He spoke not a word as He searched for my name;
When He said "it's not here" my head hung in shame.

The people whose names had been written with love
He gathered to take to His Father above.
With those who were ready He rose without a sound.
While all the rest were left standing around.

I fell to my knees, but it was too late;
I had waited too long and thus sealed my fate.
I stood and I cried as they rose out of sight;
Oh, if only I had been ready tonight.

In the words of this poem the meaning is clear;
The coming of Jesus is drawing near.
There's only one life and when comes the last call
We'll find that the Bible was true after all!

-Author Unknown

Be sure to listen to the podcast, Keeping The Spirit Of Christmas with Hostess Claire Shackelford and Co-host, Patti Katter.  Also note, we talked about BRONNERS Christmas Store.  Here's the BRONNERS website.

Our wonderful talk show hostess, Claire Shackelford had the great honor to sit down and interview Derek and Andrea McGinnis.  CLICK HERE to listen to the radio podcast.  Be sure to go to the bottom of the page where it says SPECIAL GUEST SPEAKERS VISIT WITH CMW.

by Angie Lewis 

So what's the problem with Christian marriage today? The problem is men and women have not been taught in their church to partake in their God-given roles and duties in the ways of the Lord and consequently complete chaos and confusion has ensued. Society has turned marriage and love upside down!

Christian roles for marriage have become perverted. True or false?

Immoral Christian culture has taken hold of Christian society. True or false?

Feminism has turned a wife's responsibility in marriage upside down. True or false?

True, True, and True!

God's Word has not changed just because it is the twenty first century! Husbands still have the God-given responsibility to protect and provide for their wives in the ways of the Lord. Unfortunately most Christian married couples do not understand the Godly principles that are attached to the husband being the spiritual head and confusion has ensued.

What Are The Responsibilities of the Christian Husband?

* To seek God's will for his life and marriage
* To provide for his wife financially
* To love and care for his wife the way Christ does His peopleThe Church
* To protect his wife from outside influences and abuses
* To put his marriage first, above everything else including his work and children
* To discipline and love his children in the ways of the Lord

Do you think that if a husband were living out his purpose for marriage his wife would have a problem submitting to that purpose? I think not. But what is happening now in Christian marriage is the wife works all day, and she is tired too, and the result, both husband and wife begrudgingly do merely what is needed to sustain some sort of balance in the home. But they are both emotionally drained.

In some instances, because of needs not getting met, husband and wife become disrespectful with each other. This unappreciative attitude keeps the household system in an unorganized and chaotic uproar. Pretty soon they begin to blame each other for the disarray of the marriage. The wife starts getting bossy with her husband and the husband gets bossy back and they both seek solace from outside influences.

Where is walking with the Lord, as the Christian is instructed to do?

What Are The Responsibilities of the Christian Wife?

* To seek God's will for her life and marriage
* To submit to her husbands spiritual management
* To respect and honor her husbands position
* To be a help-meet to her husband by helping to make their marriage and family life productive in and for the Lord
* To put her marriage first, above everything else including work, and even children

What can married Christian couples do today to save their marriage from becoming just another worldly marriage? They can bring God into the marriage and follow the God-given responsibilities that Christ has taught for couples to follow in marriage.

Do you see how when couples unknowingly keep God out of their marriage they begin walking as individuals instead of one flesh? The wife does her thing and the husband does his thing. But when you care for your marriage in the ways of the Lord, God's influence encourages you to be givers for each otherits part of the blessings of marriage.

On the flip side of the coin, when God is far from our own hearts, we become self-seeking, self-centered, and unappreciative and behave in ways that go against the will of God in marriage. Is it any wonder most marriages end in divorce or are unhappy?

Ask yourself, "Am I doing the will of God when I do this?" If the answer is no then pray about it. Ask Christ to guide you in the proper ways and lead you to being the man or woman that He would like for you to be for your marriage.

Are you seeking God's will for yourself and marriage? True or false?

Angie and Frank's Marriage Ministry: http://www.heavenministries.com

Click HERE to listen to the CMW Talk Show concerning Submission.

Many thanks to Shannon Ethridge as she graced us with her presence on our live talk radio program on October 10, 2009.

Shannon is a million-copy best-selling author, speaker, lay counselor, and advocate for healthy sexuality with a master’s degree in counseling/human relations from Liberty University. She has spoken to youth, college students, and adults since 1989 and her passions include: Challenging adults and teens to embrace a life of sexual integrity, encouraging married couples in their pursuit of sexual and emotional fulfillment, counseling women who have looked for love in all the wrong places and equipping parents to instill sexual values in children at an early age.

 Her passion for healthy sexuality actually began in mortuary college. Her first career choice, becoming a mortician, led Ethridge to work on dead bodies. Many she embalmed were young people who had died from AIDS or committed suicide as a result an HIV positive diagnosis. Because of her own promiscuous teenage years, she knew it was a miracle that she was standing over the embalming table rather than laying on top of it. These experiences inspired her to begin speaking boldly and bluntly to teen, college-age, and adult audiences about the benefits of sexual integrity. She has taught and counseled thousands of young singles and married couples over the past decade. She is the author of 18 books, including the best-selling Every Woman’s Battle series, the 5-book Completely His series, and her new book for the mainstream market, The Sexually Confident Wife.

Shannon has been featured on the cover of Today’s Christian Woman Magazinee, and is a frequent guest on international radio & television shows such as The 700 Club, Life Today with James & Betty Robison, FamilyLife Today with Dennis Rainey, and New Life Live! with Stephen Arterburn. She has also been published in numerous magazines such as Focus on the Family, Brio, and LifeWay and is the winner of a Gold Medallion Award for Excellence in Publishing.

Although grateful for the opportunities to influence this generation as a writer and speaker, Shannon remains most passionate about her role as a wife and best friend to her husband of 18 years, Greg, and a mother and cheerleader to their two children, Erin (17) and Matthew (14).

Please be sure to check out Shannons Website.

CLICK HERE to listen to our recorded show geared to military wives as we talk to Shannon about Sexual Integrity and Sexual Confidence in marriage.

Power of a Praying Wife devotionals for Chapters 4 and 5

His Sexuality and His Affection

 

These subjects can be very personal, embarrassing or down right frustrating.  Please read and pray for your husband.

 

Chapter 4 His Sexuality

 

Mark 10: 7-9

 

⁷'For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife,^{[b] 8}and the two will become one flesh.'^[c] So they are no longer two, but one. ⁹Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate."

 

Hebrews 13:4

 

⁴Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral.

 

 

Songs of Solomon 2:16

 

¹⁶ My lover is mine and I am his;
      

 

 

from Focus on the Family

My lover is mine and I am his. Song of Songs 2:16

These are words of belonging, words that for an engaged couple can generate tender imagining and anticipation of what life together will be. Lived out by a married couple, these words can hold together in intimacy what much of the world seems to determined to break apart. Intimacy in marriage, sexual and otherwise, was created by God and is to be fought for, delighted in, and fiercely guarded.

To yield to one another sexually in marriage is to step into God-created intimacy that takes us out of ourselves and into places where the walls can crumble and we can be tenderly vulnerable and real. There is peace and expansiveness of heart that come with this intimacy; one that offers such glorious contrast to the confusion and momentum of the world.

We must be willing to fight for intimacy in our marriages and to fiercely guard it. We fight for it by being attentive to each other’s hearts; by yielding to God in a way that allows us to more easily yield to one another. We guard it by be intentional, considering what pulls us from intimacy and stepping away from those places, considering what brings us life and stepping deliberately into those places.

My lover is mine and I am his; we long to belong. Marriage, as a coming together before God, offers a sense of belonging that mirrors our belonging to the Father. While the vulnerability that intimacy brings is sometimes hard or scary to step into, it is such a wonderfully holy place that God gives us, a place of delighting in one another that echoes of the Father’s delight in us.

Father, forgive me the places where, although I long to belong, I rebel under your covering. Forgive me the places where I choose not to yield. Let me delight so much in You that I can delight in the one you have given me in marriage, that together we might be Yours.

Copyright © 2008, Focus on the Family. All rights reserved. International copyright secured.

 

1 Corinthians 7: 3-5

 

³The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband. ⁴The wife's body does not belong to her alone but also to her husband. In the same way, the husband's body does not belong to him alone but also to his wife. ⁵Do not deprive each other except by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer.

 

 

Chapter 5 – His affection

 

Love is important in showing affection, First Corinthians 13 has been called the love chapter because of its powerful description of love. However, as I am reading this passage keep in mind that its easy to talk about love, its much harder to do the tough work of living it.  Love as God intended it is more than just passion, romantic feelings, or sentimental expressions.  It involves commitment, sacrifice, and service – the kind of things that benefit both the giver and the receiver.  Think about these things as you read

 

 

 

1 Corinthians chapter 13

 

Love

 ¹If I speak in the tongues^[a] of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. ²If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. ³If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames,^[b] but have not love, I gain nothing.

 ⁴Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. ⁵It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. ⁶Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. ⁷It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

 ⁸Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. ⁹For we know in part and we prophesy in part, ¹⁰but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears. ¹¹When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. ¹²Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.

 ¹³And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

 

Think of how we were as children.  Running to those we loved for hugs and kisses to let them know we loved them.  We showed them affection.  Don’t you still crave that affection?  I know I do.  And if we do, don’t you think that our husbands still do also?  All of this love that is there to give and receive, starts with accepting Christ’s love for you, and then committing yourself to expressing that kind of love in your life and relationships.

 

Philippians 2: 1-3

 

¹If you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any fellowship with the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, ²then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and purpose. ³Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves.

 

 

We need to make time for our husbands, give them encouraging words, touch them, hold them, kiss them, and above all else love them unconditionally.

Power of a Praying Wife - Podcast Devotional Chapter 1

 

Chapter 1 focuses on us, the wife, and what our roles are and what we can do to accept and fill those roles.

 

Proverbs 31: 10-31    In Praise of a Good Wife

10    A truly good wife is the most precious treasure a man can find!

11    Her husband depends on her, and she never lets him down.

12    She is good to him every day of her life,

13    And with her own hands she gladly makes clothes.

14    She is like a sailing ship that brings food from across the sea.

15    She gets up before daylight to prepare food for her family and for her servants.

16    She knows how to buy land and how to plant a vineyard,

17       and she always works hard.

18    She knows when to buy or sell, and she stays busy until late at night.

19    She pins her own cloth,

20    And she helps the poor and the need.

21    Her family has warm clothing, and so she doesn’t worry when it snows.

22    She does her won sewing, and everything she wears is beautiful.

23    Her husband is a well-known and respected leader in the city.

24    She makes clothes to sell to the shop owners.

25    She is strong and graceful, as well as cheerful about the future.

26    Her words are sensible, and her advice is thoughtful.

27    She takes good care of her family and is never lazy.

28    Her children praise her, and with great pride her husband says,

29    “There are many good women, but you are the best!”

30    Charm can be deceiving, and beauty fades away, but a woman who honors the Lord deserves to be praised.

31    Show her respect – praise her in public for what she has done.

 

The woman of Proverbs 31 is a model, for both men and women of a way of living that brings fulfillment and contentment.  She exhibits a lifestyle of work and love based on godly wisdom.

 

1 Peter 3: 1-5   Wives and Husbands

 

            1 If you are a wife, you must put your husband first.  Even if he opposes our message, you will win him over by what you do.  No one else will have to say anything to him, 2 because he will see how you honor God and live a pure life.  3 Don’t depend on things fancy hairdos or gold jewelry or expensive clothes to make you look beautiful.  4 Be beautiful in your heart by being gentle and quiet.  This kind of beauty will last, and God considers it very special.  5 Long ago those women who worshiped God and put their hope in him made themselves beautiful by putting their husbands first.

 

Ephesians 5: 21-33    Wives and Husbands

 

            21 Honor Christ and put others first.  22 A wife should put her husband first, as she does the Lord.  23 A husband is the head of his wife, as Christ is the head of the Savior of the church, which is his own body.  24 Wives should always put their husbands first, as the church puts Christ first.

            25 A husband should love his wife as much as Christ loved the church and gave his life for it.  26 He made the church holy by the power of his word, and he made it pure by washing it with water.  27 Christ did this, so that he would have a glorious and holy church, without faults or spots or wrinkles or any other flaws.

            28 In the same way, a husband should love his wife as much as he loves himself.  A husband who loves his wife shows that he loves himself.  29 None of us hate our own bodies.  We provide for them and take good care of them, just as Christ does for the church, 30 because we are each pare of his body.  31 As the Scriptures say, “A man leaves his father and mother to get married, and he becomes like one person with his wife.”  32 This is a great mystery, but I understand it to mean Christ and his church.  33 So each husband should love his wife as much as he loves himself, and each wife should respect her husband.

 

 Chapter 1 Prayer – Power of a Praying Wife by Stormie Omartian

 

            Lord, Help me to be a good wife.  I fully realize that I don’t have what it takes to be one without your help.  Take my selfishness, impatience, and irritability and turn them into kindness, long-suffering, and the willingness to bear all things.  Take my old emotional habits, mindsets, automatic reactions, rude assumptions, and self-protective stance, and make me patient, kind, good, faithful, gentle, and self-controlled.  Take the hardness of my heart and break down the walls with Your battering ram of revelation.  Give me a new heart and work in me Your love, peace, and joy (Galatians 5:22,23).  I am not able to rise above who I am at this moment.  Only You can transform me.

            Show me where there is sin in my heart, especially with regard to my husband.  I confess the times I’ve been unloving, critical, angry, resentful, disrespectful, or unforgiving toward him.  Help me to put aside any hurt, anger, or disappointment I feel and forgive him the way You do – totally and completely, no looking back.  Make me a tool of reconciliation, peace, and healing in this marriage.  Enable us to communicate well and rescue us from the threshold of separation where the realities of divorce begin.

            Make me my husband’s helpmate, companion, champion, friend, and support.  Help me to create a peaceful, restful, safe place for him to come home to.  Teach me how to take care of myself and stay attractive to him.  Grow me into a creative and confident woman who is rich in mind, soul, and spirit.  Make me the kind of woman he can be proud to say is his wife.

            I lay all my expectations at Your cross.  I release my husband from the burden of fulfilling me in areas where I should be looking to You.  Help me to accept him the way he is and not try to change him.  I realize that in some ways he may never change, but at the same time, I release him to change in ways I never thought he could.  I leave any changing that needs to be done in Your hands, fully accepting that neither of us is perfect and never will be.  Only You, Lord, are perfect and I look to You to perfect us. 

            Teach me how to pray for my husband and make my prayers a true language of love.  Where love has died, create new love between us.  Show me what unconditional love really is and how to communicate it in a way he can clearly perceive.  Bring unity between us so that we can be in agreement about everything (Amos 3:3).  May the God of patience and comfort grant us to be like-minded toward on another, according to Christ Jesus (Romans 15:5).  Make us a team, not pursuing separate, competitive, or independent lives, but working together, overlooking each other’s faults and weaknesses for the greater good of the marriage.  Help us to pursue the things which make for peace and the things by which one may edify another (Romans 14:19).  May we be “perfectly joined together in the same mind and in the same judgment” (1 Corinthians 1:10).

            I pray that our commitment to You and to one another will grow stronger and more passionate every day.  Enable him to be the head of the home as You made him to be, and show me how to support and respect him as he rises to that place of leadership.  Help me to understand his dreams and see things from his perspective.  Reveal to me what he wants and needs and show me potential problems before they arise.  Breathe Your life into this marriage.

            Make me a new person, Lord.  Give me a fresh perspective, a positive outlook, and a renewed relationship with the man You’ve given me.  Help me see him with new eyes, new appreciation, new love, new compassion, and new acceptance.  Give my husband a new wife, and let it be me.

Gossip is one of those things that almost every woman has somehow been involved in, whether it is has been on the giving end or receiving end. Because we live in a culture and society that thrives on gossiping, bad-mouthing, and making fun of others, it is extremely easy to be influenced and participate! With military women especially, gossip happens all the time. There are many reasons why we women gossip – sometimes it’s just for fun, sometimes it’s to make ourselves look better, and sometimes it’s not done for the purpose of bad-mouthing but out of a concern for someone else. However, as Christians, the Lord desires for us to speak words of healing, encouragement, love, and kindness - those that build up, not put down. So how do we keep from gossiping, and what does God’s Word say on the subject?

Well, a few of our brave CMW ladies have tackled this sticky subject by sharing their hearts, experiences, and what the Bible has to say! You can hear what we have to say by clicking HERE. All of CMW's podcasts are located under the CMW Media tab; you can also download the podcast or share it with someone else.

*For reference purposes, here are the Scriptures that were shared during the show:

Proverbs 16:24 - "Pleasant words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones."

Proverbs 20:19-20 - "He who goes about as a slanderer   reveals secrets, Therefore do not associate with a gossip.
       He who curses his father or his mother,
   His lamp will go out in time of darkness."

Proverbs 31:26 - "She opens her mouth in wisdom,
         And the teaching of kindness is on her tongue." 

Proverbs 18:21 - "Death and life are in the power of the   tongue,
         And those who love it will eat its fruit."

Romans 12:14 - "Bless those who persecute you; bless and do  not curse."

James 3:5-10 - "So also the tongue is a small part of the body, and yet it boasts of great things. See how great a  forest is set aflame by such a small fire!

 And the tongue is a fire, the very world of iniquity; the tongue is set among our members as that which defiles  the entire body, and sets on fire the course of our life, and   is set on fire by hell.

 For every species of beasts and birds, of reptiles and creatures of the sea, is tamed and has been tamed by the human race.

But no one can tame the tongue; it is a restless evil and full of deadly poison.

 With it we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in the likeness of God;

 from the same mouth come both blessing and cursing. My brethren, these things ought not to be this way."

Romans 14:4,10 - "Who are you to judge the servant of another? To his own master he stands or falls; and he will stand, for the Lord is able to make him stand. ...But you, why do you judge your brother? Or you again, why do you regard your brother with contempt? For we will all stand before the judgment seat of God."

Romans 12:16 - "Be of the same mind toward one another; do not be haughty in mind, but associate with the lowly. Do not be wise in your own estimation."

Proverbs 15:1 - "A gentle answer turns away wrath,
         But a harsh word stirs up anger."

(*All verses are taken from the New American Standard Bible.)