ChristianMilitaryWives

I have four beautiful, healthy and  brilliant children. They consume my time and they consume my heart. Most of what I do is centered around their lives…their issues, their appointments, their character, their schooling, their health, their food, their bottoms (as in SIT on your bottom, do you prefer to obey or to have a sore bottom, or let me wipe…you know), and most of all my walk with God so that I can be available to them as a mom with her heart after God’s own heart. It is hard work, absolutely, but I still find it somewhat odd and sad that people so often focus on the number of children I have…the number one comment I receive from strangers? ‘You’ve got your hands full.’ The second favorite? ‘Are they all YOURS?’ That one makes me chuckle because I always wonder if I look like I’ve accidentally borrowed some children. Even if I had adopted any, they would still be my own children, wouldn’t they?!

Honestly, though I’ve always wanted four children, I thought I would quit after the first three. I was dog-tired. I was doing the ‘military spouse serving as a single mom with three toddlers’ grind, and my husband and I were stressed out and at odds often. All my well-laid plans to use cloth diapers, to breastfeed my babies, and to enjoy my motherhood kept getting hindered or waylaid as I switched to disposable diapers after I couldn’t keep up with a third in cloth, as my milk dried up because of  back to back pregnancies, mastitis and babies who slept too well at night (go figure). I went back and forth between making homemade baby and toddler food and scarfing Wendy’s drive thru on the way home from anywhere. I didn’t know whether to laugh or to cry when I discovered that my 11-month-old son, Samuel’s, first words were, ‘thop dat!’ finger pointing and all. My conversations with my children seemed to all start and end with ‘NO’ and I was weary and angry about the loss of my dream of motherhood bliss. It wasn’t easy, beautiful, serene or fun…it was breathtakingly, tongue-draggingly, exhaustively tiring!

I’m over the ‘will I survive potty-training?’ stage, and even with a 10-month-old baby, having the older children be 9, 8 and 6 means that the baby always has doting siblings to entertain and love on him while I work or rest. We all enjoy him together and we are having so much fun! When my husband was deployed to Iraq my girls actually brought 3 year old Samuel to me, by the hand, and formally requested that I produce a baby brother for him. After all, the girls had each other and he had no one on his side. (I suspect this could have had something to do with him terrorizing their playsets). I thought that was cute, and told them that that was the kind of thing that you would take to God in prayer, that it was out of my hands. I really thought I was done at 3 children anyways, so it truly had to be an act of God! The 4 and 5  year old sisters, took Samuel by the hand and began praying for a baby brother together.

One year and nine months after Steve came home from a grueling, long deployment, God laid it on my heart to have room for another baby. I shared that with Steve and he agreed. Little did we know that I was already almost a month pregnant! When I shared the news with the children they actually remembered their prayer request from almost 3 years earlier and they rejoiced, saying, “God answered our prayers! God answered our prayers!” When I informed them it would be a boy at 20 weeks, they looked at me with some puzzlement…”But Mommy, we PRAYED for a BOY, remember?” Properly chastened at my unbelief, I reveled in the fact that their young faith had been so strong and unwavering even while I had been skeptical and unwilling. We named our baby Nathan, which means ‘God’s gift,’ and he has been an integral part of healing and unifying our family. We enjoy our sweet baby so much, but Samuel and the girls all consider Nathan to be his very own, made-to-order baby, and big brother can’t wait to share a room with baby brother. Samuel accepts ownership of his one and only prayed for brother.

So yes, in this day and age, I suppose four children is slightly unusual for two ‘educated parents.’ Many of my peers back in CA started having babies later life because of their careers, and will likely stop at the proverbial 2 or 2.5 children (whatever that may mean.) I’ve surprised most of the older generation in my family because they fully expected me to pop out two kids and go back to school or work. I am something of an anomaly or an exasperation to them, and they still ask me, ‘you ARE done having kids, aren’t you?’ I may be done, only God really knows, but I have had such peace and joy about having these four entirely individual, beautiful little people in our lives. I was given the grace to have them and to raise them, and I’m not a supermom by any stretch of the imagination. Grace has empowered me to grow with each child, and that experience may range from super-painful to super-sweet, but not super-mom! My husband and I may never become rich, famous or powerful, but I do know that we are investing and pouring what we learn as we grow into each child, with prayer and repentance all along the way. We know that God will bless that commitment and multiply the blessings that follow. We are preparing to launch them into a faith-filled, successful adulthood.

So do we have our hands full? Sure we do. I’d like to think that our quiver is full and that God’s cup runneth over!

³ Sons are a heritage from the LORD,
children a reward from him.

⁴ Like arrows in the hands of a warrior
are sons born in one’s youth.

⁵ Blessed is the man
whose quiver is full of them.
They will not be put to shame
when they contend with their enemies in the gate.

Psalm 127:3-5

http://msnancyks.wordpress.com/2010/05/17/youve-got-your-hands-full/

I wrote this a couple of years ago and came across it. I must have been in quite a mood and in deep need of a break when I wrote it. I hope it encourages you! 

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06:30 and all is quiet on the home front.

Too quiet for a seasoned veteran like me.

I am not a veteran of foreign wars, mind you, but I am a veteran of the home front. I am in many occupation specialties, and I hold many ranks.

I am the acting Commander in Chief, General, and every rank known down to Private.

I am an Infantry soldier while I run after a busy and precocious toddler.

I am Cavalry and my transportation is my noble Windstar (complete with emptysippy cups and toddler music galore -- it could scare the toughest enemy!).

I am in Artillery and I can launch a dirty diaper and hit the destination target faster than the speed of light.

I am in Special Forces and my handle is "Stealth Mom." I am able to walk down hallways past a sleeping child's room more quietly than a feather on the wind. I put Spider Man to shame - he has no moves on me. I can go undetected by toddler radar for up to 20 minutes in the morning. I have also been known to know much more about a teenager's friends than they thought I should know as well as their exact global location.

Legal services, medical, psychological and special equipment? Been there doing that. Oh, and let's not forget about the Physical Fitness requirements. I can sprint faster than a toddler running through the toy isle at Toys R Us. I can jump baby gates like an Olympic runner jumping hurdles, and my life consists of a constant squat thrust as I walk through my house picking up toys, socks, shoes, and cheerios off of the floor. "Two steps, squat, grab, back up we go..." and the reps continue. All day long. Sit ups? Well I will have to actually have time to lay on the floor before I can tell you how many of those I can actually do.

Recruiting and retention have been successful. We have had 50% of our recruits stay until retirement, and we fully expect the other 50% to do the same. So far it looks as if this home base is being run quite well. I think we have earned a little R& R!

The curly headed pirate is gone for the day. She is at a sister base and will receive some additional training from another unit. So, today this veteran mom is actually off duty. My house is spotless, laundry done, and the baby is away. I think this calls for a pedicure, a nap and maybe a hair cut. A Stealth Mom can dream!

My DH and I have been talking a lot about Christmas lately.  It will be our 1st Christmas together as a family!  We talk about our traditions we had growing up and what Christmas really stands for.  My parents lavished gifts on my sister and I.  We loved it that's for sure but now that I am married with a child of my own I want her to have a gift of giving.  I find myself being very selfish as is human nature, but I want her and myself to share the joy we have because of our Lord and Savior and how He gave the ultimate gift for us.  So as a new tradition in our household...we will all give a gift to someone in need this Christmas and every month of the year.  When we give of ourselves, we receive joy.  I don't know if any one else's church has an angel tree or something similar at Christmas but my daughter, even though she won't be 1, will choose a child to give to.  Also, there are always organizations that need help.  Our church also has a Women's ministry which gives to the local women in prison.  Anybody else have any suggestions?

Beatitudes for Parents

Blessed are those parents who make their peace with spilled milk and with mud, for of such is the kingdom of childhood.

Blessed is the parent who engages not in the comparison of his child with others, for precious unto each is the rhythm of his own growth.

Blessed are the fathers and mothers who have learned laughter, for it is the music of the child’s world.

Blessed and wise are those parents who understand the goodness of time, for they make it not a sword that kills growth but a shield to protect.

Blessed and mature are they who without anger can say "no", for comforting to the child is the security of firm decisions.

Blessed is the gift of consistency, for it is heart’s-ease in childhood.

Blessed are they who accept the awkwardness of growth, for they are aware of the choice between marred furnishings and damaged personalities.

Blessed are the teachable, for knowledge brings understanding, and understanding brings love.

Blessed are the men and women who in the midst of the unpromising mundane, give love, for they bestow the greatest of all gifts to each other, to their children, and—in an ever-widening circle—to their fellow men.

Marion E. Kinneman
(1895-1985)